WHO IS JACK SCHITT? When someone says to you "You dont know Jack SCHITT", you can now prove them wrong because you'll know all about Jack Schitt. Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnet, who married Oh Schitt, the owner of Kneedeep Schitt Inn. Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and they produced six children. Holly Schitt, their first, passed on shortly after birth. Next came twin sons, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt, two daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, and another son, Bull Schitt. Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out.Dip Schitt married Lotta Schitt and they have a son, Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens brothers. The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg Schitt, Byrd Schitt and Cowe Schitt. Bull Schitt just married his second cousin, Pisa Schitt. They now await the arrival of a little Schitt. Now you know "Jack Schitt".