Fourth Law of Applied Terror: The night before the English History mid-term, your Biology instructor will assign 200 pages on planaria. Corollary: Every instructor assumes that you have nothing else to do except study for that instructor's class. Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, and a dark side, and it holds the universe together. Too much of a good thing is WONDERFUL. -- Mae West Weinberg's Second Law: If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first wood- pecker that came along would destroy civilization. You don't have to think too hard when you talk to teachers. -- J. D. Salinger If bankers can count, how come they have eight windows and only four tellers? Diplomacy is the art of saying "nice doggy" until you can find a rock. The brain is a wonderful organ: it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get to school. Micro Credo: Never trust a computer bigger than you can lift. Yield to temptation....it may not pass your way again. -- Lazarus Long Idiot: A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling. Minnie Mouse is a bad maze learner. It has been discovered that research causes cancer in rats. You know it's going to be a bad day when: your cake collapses from the weight of the candles.