A three-year-old went with her dad to see a litter of kittens. On returning home, she breathlessly informed her mother there were 2 girl kittens and 2 boy kittens. "How did you know?" her mom asked. "Daddy picked them up and looked underneath," she replied, "I think it's printed on the bottom." ------------------------------ Another three year old put his shoes on by himself. His mother noticed the left was on the right foot. She said, "Son, your shoes are on the wrong feet." He looked up at her with a raised brow and said, "Don't kid me, Mom, I know they're my feet." ------------------------------ On the first day of school, the Kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers." A little voice from the back of the room asked, "How will that help?" ------------------------------ A mother and her young daughter returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The girl opened a box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. "What are you doing?" her mother asked. "The box says you can't eat them if the seal is broken," the girl explained. "I'm looking for the seal." ------------------------------ A father was reading Bible stories to his young daughter. He read, "The man named Lot was warned to take his wife and flee out of the city, but his wife looked back and was turned to salt." His daughter asked, "What happened to the flea?" ------------------------------ A four-year-old girl was learning to say the Lord's Prayer. She was reciting it all by herself without help from her mother. She said "And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us some e-mail. AMEN" ------------------------------ Pancake Breakfast A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait.'" Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus" ------------------------------ A Wedding Story. . . . A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming down the aisle he would take two steps, stop, and turn to the crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side). While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar...so it went, step, step, ROAR, step, step, ROAR all the way down the aisle. As you can imagine, the crowd was near tears from laughing so hard by the time he reached the pulpit. The little boy, however, was getting more and more distressed from all the laughing, and was also near tears by the time he reached the pulpit. When asked what he was doing, the child sniffed and said, "I was being the Ring Bear..."