Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb and Quasimodo were talking. Sleeping Beauty said "I reckon I'm the most beautiful girl in the world." Tom Thumb said "I reckon I'm the smallest person in the world." Quasimodo said "I must be the ugliest man in the world." So they went down to the Guinness Book of Records to have their claims ratified. Sleeping Beauty came out first looking deliriously happy: "It's official. I AM the most beautiful girl in the world!" Tom Thumb emerged ecstatic: "And I am officially the smallest person in the world!" Sometime later, Quasimodo came out looking crestfallen and simply said "Who's Linda Tripp?"