Two boys are playing football in Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips a board off the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar & twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "Forty Niners' fan saves friend from vicious animal," he starts writing in his notebook. "But I'm not a Niners fan," the boy replied. "Oakland Raiders' fan rescues friend from horrific attack," the reporter starts again. "I'm not a Raiders fan either," the boy said. "Then what are you?" the reporter asked. "I'm a Cowboys fan." The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Crazed redneck kills family pet."