Here's the latest innovation in relationship building compliments of some creative Managed Care Organization: Welcome to Managed Friends, a whole new way of thinking about friends and relationships. The Managed Friends Plan (MFP) combines all the advantages of a traditional friends network with important cost-saving features. How Does It Work? Under the Plan, you choose your friends from a network of pre-screened accredited Friends Providers (FPs). All your friendship needs are met by members of your Managed Friends Staff. What's Wrong with my Current Friends? If you're like most people, you are receiving friendship services from a network of providers haphazardly patched together from your old neighborhoods, jobs, and schools. The result is often costly duplication, inefficiency, and conflict. Many of your current friends may not meet national standards, responding to your needs with inappropriate, outmoded, or even experimental acts of friendship. Under Managed Friends, your friendship needs are coordinated by your designated Best Friend, who will ensure the quality and goodness of fit of all your friendly relationships. How Do I Know That the Plan's Panel of Friends Is Not Made Up of a Bunch of Losers Who Can't Make Friends on Their Own? What If I Need a Special Friend, Say, for Poker or Fishing? Special Friends are responsible for most of the unnecessary and expensive activities that burden already costly relationships. Under the Managed Friends Plan, your Best Friend is qualified to pre-approve your referral to a Special Friend within the Managed Friendship Network should your needs fall outside of the scope of his/her friendship. Suppose I Want to See Friends Outside the Managed Friendship Network? You may make friends outside of the Managed Friends Network only in the event of a Friendship Emergency. What is a Friend's Emergency? The Managed Friends Plan covers your friendship needs 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, even if you need a friend out of town, after regular business hours, or when your Best Friend is with someone else. You might be on a business trip, for instance, and suddenly find that you are feeling lonely. In such cases, you may make a New Friend, and all approved friendly activities will be covered under the Plan, provided you notify the Managed Friends Office (or the 24-hour Friends Hotline) within two business days. How Can I Find Out More About the Managed Friends Plan? A simple call is all it takes. If you need a friend, just call our toll-free number. Or visit our web site. Sign up for the Managed Friends Plan and rest easier that all of your appropriate friendship needs will be met. Who Decides What's Appropriate for Me? We do. Isn't that what friends are for?